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Possibly you're trying to rekindle an former flame, or mayhap you take merely changed your mind about someone you turned downward. Whatever your circumstances, there are some techniques y'all can employ to date someone you previously rejected. By making the conclusion to pursue them, working on self-comeback, and finally reconnecting, you lot can date a person that you turned down before.

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    Observe out if they're dating someone. If the person you've got your eye on has already moved on with somebody else, you might need to let them get.[1]

    • Ask mutual friends nigh their relationship status
    • Check social media for clues
    • Recall if you've seen them out with everyone

  2. two

    Assess why information technology didn't work earlier. In that location was a reason (or reasons) why yous rejected them in the first place. Information technology can exist easy to ignore these issues if you haven't seen them for a while, or if you're merely feeling lonely. Only it is really important to acknowledge the concerns yous had before, and determine if you can overcome them. Otherwise, you are probable to hurt them again.[ii]

    • Did you notice them unattractive or annoying? If so, has this changed?
    • Did they hurt yous or lose your trust? If and so, will you be able to get by information technology?
    • Were you going through a rough time in your life when you rejected them? Have things changed?
    • Were yous but incompatible? If and so, practice you think you'll be able to compromise and discover rest?

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  3. 3

    Look for clues almost how they feel. If you lot are still in touch with this person, try to assess how they feel about you. This tin can help you lot determine whether or non it's worth it to put yourself out there. Spend some time objectively evaluating how they human activity when you're around. Yous might also ask for the stance of a shut friend.[3]

    • Negative signs include: changing their phone number, not responding to your texts, avoiding you.
    • Positive signs include: lighting upward when you come into the room, making fourth dimension for y'all when you ask, continuing shut to you when you're out with friends.

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  2. 2

    Make a plan. Attempt to call back about how you can be more attractive to this person, and cull that method for improving your life. Once you've settled on a goal, break that goal downward into manageable steps. Set deadlines for each step.[five]

    • If you are trying to become a better listener, do with your friends and family. You lot can also ask them for feedback to meet if you've improved.
    • If yous are trying to look amend, interruption this down into dissimilar parts. Brand a program to take your hair done. Enquire a stylist friend to help y'all pick out some new dress. Bring together a gym.
    • If you'd like to be more in bear on with your emotions, schedule some time each twenty-four hours to reverberate on how you feel. Start a gratitude journal. Speak with a close friend, family unit member, or therapist.
    • If y'all'd like to improve your living space, outset by cleaning your space and clearing out clutter. Then move on to organizing your things and adding some decorative pieces.

  3. 3

    Take activeness. Subsequently you have a program in identify, you have to first making changes. This is the nigh difficult (but most rewarding) role of self-improvement. Simply focus on each modest step at a time, and endeavor not to be overwhelmed past the big picture. As yous continue to improve your life, you lot will get more attractive to the person you want to accomplish.[6]

    • Choose a start engagement (no more than than 2 weeks in the hereafter) and decide your first footstep. When that date comes, don't hesitate! Hit the gym, start your gratitude journal, or begin cleaning!
    • Stay motivated by celebrating every modest victory.
    • Seek out a community of people striving toward similar goals.

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  1. 1

    Ship a sweet text. If yous are gear up to reconnect with them, kickoff past sending a text. This is a casual way to start a conversation, and test out how they feel. If they respond inside a few hours, and if their tone matches yours, it is probably a skillful idea to keep pursuing them.[7]

    • Try not to brand it seem like you're looking for a booty telephone call.
    • Y'all could say, "It'due south been so long since nosotros've hung out. I promise you're well."

  2. 2

    Keep the conversation going. Go on communicating casually via text message for a few days or a week. If there is a good back and along happening, eventually work up to telling them you lot miss them. You might say, "Talking with you has been and so much fun. I actually miss spending time with you."[eight]

    • Do not send another text until they have responded to your concluding ane.
    • Avoid sending more a couple of texts per day.
    • Information technology is OK to have a day off between communications.
    • Respond to any texts from them inside 2 hours.

  3. 3

    Ain up to what you said or did in the past. Even if they seem open to reconnecting, they probably have some reservations. You are going to need to admit any ways y'all might have hurt them in the past, and attempt to reassure them that you won't do it again.[9]

    • Y'all might say, "I know I hurt you last time we tried this. I was selfish and scared, and I'm sorry."
    • Y'all could follow up with, "I have really tried to change and improve myself. I similar to think I'1000 a meliorate person this time around."
    • Avert rehashing every particular of the past. This should exist a gamble to starting time fresh.

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    First with a casual meet-up. If everything goes well, ask them out for a engagement. Start with something casual, similar meeting up for a cocktail or coffee, to continue the stakes depression. You will know right away if it feels similar it's working. If yous are both enjoying each other'south company, plan a second date.[x]

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